A.K.A. You Must be This Tall to Ride
Where the frilly heck have I been!?
There is a ark load of stuff that’s been happening in my life that isn’t even writing related. It’s as though I took a backseat while life grabbed hold of the wheel and went for a joyride.
However, without going into details, not all was well in Whoville.
When I say my life has been a roller coaster of late, I’m not on said roller coaster. It’s more like I got thrown on the tracks and the cars are barreling towards me as I run up and down the slopes, round the loops just trying to get through the ride alive.
You must be THIS TALL to ride this life.
I was so overwhelmed by everything going on around me that everything came to a grinding halt. The writing, the motivation, everything.
We went to my SO’s family farm to celebrate his birthday and I was so inspired by my surroundings that it reignited my passion for a story I had long since backburnered. After a lackluster plough through NaNo last November, this spark left me excited indeed. I was brainstorming, restructuring plotlines, exploring new ones.
That was a month ago, then nothing. Nada. Zilch. The Grinding Halt returned. What was holding me back? What was I afraid of?
Why do we fear? Humans weren’t born with fear. As children, we were fearless in our exploration, our curiosity, inherently aware that not all who wander are lost, even though we may not have realized it, at the time.
Fear is a construct. We learned to be scared. We are taught to fear. Overprotective parents worried that we’d get hurt when we fall, the ‘… or else’ approach to discipline, or perhaps their simple desire of keeping us cocooned in ignorantly safe bliss.
Fear of failure. Fear of change. Fear of the unknown. There’s nothing to fear but fear itself. What am I afraid of? Fear isn’t holding me back. I’m holding myself back. I need to overcome the fear. It starts now.
I write this pledge on an auspicious day of leapage. Let’s just make sure I don’t end up posting once every four years, hmm? I’m going to get my creative gears turning once more, I’m going to continue the job hunt because idle hands, well, shouldn’t be idle, they should be typing or writing or drawing. Something. I need to do something to get out of the rut to ungrind my halt.
I’m going to give Fear a swift uppercut to the chin and keep on keepin’ on.
This detour is over. I was merely wandering about…
Time to get back to it.
Leap (year) of faith. Hope you’re all doing swell in your neck of the woods. I promise to keep in touch. 🙂
(all photos via Google Images)